Grease is the word

I just randomly thought about that, really.. haha.. I wasn't thinking about Grease at all.

Anyways, I should be doing a million other things like my chem lab and my first aid scenarios and everything else but of course I'm not, what do you think this is?

I haven't been up to much. I guess I forgot to write a week ago when I found out that I got into the Athletic Training program - - but I did! haha. I'm really excited.. I was running around screaming for a while. We have an orientation meeting on Thursday and that's when I'm hoping to find out a bit more about the time commitment I'm looking at next year to try to figure out if I'll be able to compete in cross and track next year.. I'm going to cry if I can't.

I am really concerned about this season, because I seem to be pretty well in shape but I have been constantly feeling like I am on the brink of injury, and its not a feeling that I enjoy at all. My feet and shins are having a lot of trouble living right now. Also, my brother had mono last month and my sister just found out she got it from him, so I'm scared I'm going to get it just as the track season and the school year is ending. I will be fucking PISSED, because this is when I'm supposed to peak and PR, and if I get mono at all and it ruins the end of my season.. well.. I don't even know what I will do. I'm freaking out because the lymph nodes in my neck are swollen to a degree, but I am hoping its just a cold or something. My brother and sister both only had to take off from physical activity for like a week, though, which is weird because I thought it was supposed to make you unable to function for like, several months. Either way, I'm really paranoid about getting it.

Anyways yeah... I guess I PR-ed in the 1500 this past weekend.... It doesn't really seem like much, I don't know.. I mean, it doesn't mean as much as a mile PR does, for some reason, but I guess it means I did PR in the mile, too.. I ran a 5:00 flat 1500, if I had gone just a few seconds faster I would have made my goal for the season (sub 5)... whatever. I ran just 5 seconds back from this girl who runs for the Badgers, so that wasn't bad at all..

I also made my 5k debut on Friday. I felt bad about this all week, because its not my event, its Brittany's, and I guess now Audrey's, too, so I felt like it was wrong for me to come in and run their race... I mean I was doing it to see if I can compete with these Illinois club girls, but still. I don't know.

It was a pretty ridiculous race.. I don't know that I like it at all. I think I would prefer the 3k/ 2mile just because that doesn't even seem painful compared to the 5k. And by painful, I mean painfully long. I wasn't in pain in the 5k, I just found it obnoxiously long. I'm sure that's mostly because I am in track mode and therefore don't believe in races longer than a mile, but either way.. I don't know.

I was concerned about going out too fast. I went out in 1:27 and was breezing along, but I made sure to control myself for once and promised that if I felt like it later I would pick it up and negative split like I have in my 2 mile tempo runs and whatever. I didn't quite do that. My first mile was around 6:03 and then I ran a 6:19 second mile for a total time of around 12:22, which was a 2 mile PR. My final mile was, well, I forget, but with 100m to go I was at 18:58 (thanks to Dallas screaming at me at the final turn). My final time was 19:17.

I didn't really want to talk about it when I finished, and I didn't to tell like Audrey or anyone my time really; I felt bad knowing that everyone else in that race had actually been trying and I had only tried on probably the last couple of laps. At the same time, I want to be able to speak candidly about it, which is why I'm writing it here, because I felt like talking about it like that to my friends on the team was disrespectful to their race as a whole. At the same time I'm proud that I was able to run in the 19s without training for that race. I mean, I've been training as a miler, and I haven't had any huge mileage at all this season because I'm lazy and I don't believe in epic, endless miles, but I knew I could race it at least at tempo pace because it would only be around 6 min mile pace and I can do that specifically because I am able to race a mile singularly at 5:20 pace.

That's something Dallas kept screaming at me, and part of why I got annoyed in my race, because of how many opportunities he had to yell things at me. I normally enjoy his sideline antics but 12 chances for him to yell at me was a bit much, when he was telling me to pick it up or something. I didn't want to pick it up because I didn't care about the race to the extent that I was running it for a particular time or anything.. I was just RUNNING it, and that's all. I had no vested interest in what time I ran it, just for the fact of knowing that I could.

Now, if I actually raced it, I should really be able to run at least one mile at sub-6 pace. If I really raced it and were real about keeping my splits at 90 or below, I would run in the 18s and I would beat those Illinois girls. In all rights, Dallas was right to tell me to speed up because I can race a 5:20 mile. I should have technically been running 5:50s, if I had been trying, not dropping to 6:20. I should be able to at least maintain 2nd and 3rd miles of 6:10 or better. This is true only for the facts: I can run at 5:20 pace, and the point of a race is to run even splits.

Last season I was able to run pretty similar splits, and very neat ones for the 800 I raced at the very end. The goal of a distance race is to run pretty splits. If I raced the 5k consistently I would be able to find that place. I am not going to race the 5k consistently, because I don't want to. If I run it at Loras to beat those Illinois girls, I will definitely take it far less lackadaisically than I did this one, and I obviously need to keep to my splits far more carefully. We'll see how that goes.

I need to PR big in the 1500m this Friday. If I don't I will be upset. The past couple 1500s, though, I have felt empty in the last 400, I have felt like I wasn't moving and like I've just been kicking at the air, and not going very fast at all. I don't know if this correlates to me taking out both of those races in about 1:16, or if I just am losing speed or iron levels, but I'm not so glad about it and I hope that doesn't happen again this Friday. I have to go sub-5 this Friday, and that makes me pretty nervous.

So anyways, I need to stop writing and do homework and shit.. I have a chem exam Monday and a physics exam Tuesday.. I'm trying to pretend its not real.. but that's not going to give me B's in the class, which I need to stay in the Kines program... UGH!! Help!